DANCE MOMS RECAP EPISODE 32: The Dancing Dead

I am still on cloud 9 after this week’s episode!

1.  There were no Candy Apples!
2.  We weren’t forced to bow down at the Maddie Ziegler alter.
3.  There was taxidermy!

What wasn’t there to love this week?  Before I go on gushing let’s dive into the recap.

Starting off the bottom of the pyramid is Brooke and Paige.  Personally I am amazed that they are even still on the pyramid.  Abby made a snarky quip about Brooke blowing off her dance career to pursue music, though I am pretty sure she takes vocal lessons at Abby’s studio. Next on the bottom is Payton, Asia and then Mackenzie.  Little Zeigler topped Asia and you can see the skin on Kristie Ray’s face get even tighter.  Kicking off the second row is Chloe, then Maddie, and finally Kendal.  Apparently Maddie is “too perfect” and needs to learn she isn’t always on top.  This is week 2 in the second row for Maddie.  Personally, I thought that was a breach of contract somewhere but I’m not making a fuss.  If you noticed since there are three girls in the second row that means there is only the top spot left and that leaves NIA!

“Look out little girl”, Asia.

The team is off to Xfinity dance in Orlando armed with a group routine and 3 solos.

Group Number (whole team including Payton)  – “On the Verge”
Solo (Chloe) – Spanish Ballet “Fired Up”
Solo (Kendal) – Lyrical “Under My Spell” Solo (Nia!!!) – Tribute to Broadway Baby Melissa, in her normal passive aggressive manner, notes that she and the girls had a really close relationship with Broadway Baby and that she knows Maddie would have loved to perform the tribute [instead of Nia]

“I guess scooping all that poop didn’t get you too far, now did it Melissa?” –Christie

Next scene we cut from the ALDC and are standing in the home of Ted Bundy the Back to Life Taxidermy store.  (Are they called stores?) and the owner brings out a stuffed Broadway Baby.  Abby gets really emotional and starts stroking the dead creature’s fur.  How can I say this while being polite…. Um I can’t so screw it.. THAT IS CREEPY!   What is next?  A wax figure of Maddie (the only other being Abby cares for?) ALSO – I will be the first to admit that I do not know anything about art of taxidermy but that looks like a pretty shoddy job.  But then again how good can it look— it’s a dead dog!  Ughhh okay moving on.

http://www.btltaxidermy.com/photos/AbbyMiller-BroadwayBaby1%20%5B800x600%5D.jpg

Next week’s dance will feature a piece on reincarnation. I think we all know what Abby would come back as.. OINK!

There is a whole bunch of Payton/Leslie drama…  We are members of this team.. blah blah… my daughter deserves this… blah blah…. I need some Botox … blah blah…..

Why did I sign a six year contract?

The moms (except Melissa and Leslie) all meet at Kelly’s house for drinks and try and convince her to come back.  We find out that Abby asked Chloe to come out to LA but that all the moms agreed that they would not send their daughter’s out there.  Kelly says that she is still coming to the competition to watch.  ***FYI in case you were wondering she didn’t just fly from Pittsburg to Orlando to make a point—Brooke and Paige had a “Meet & Greet” down there as well.

Kelly shows up at the competition and Abby makes a big scene about not getting up to let her sit in the row.  In the dressing room Abby reminds the girls that nationals is coming up and to think of this as an audition for solos in nationals.  Abby asks Maddie is she misses having a solo… stupid question Abby Lee.

I liked PRETENDING not to have a solo better than not having one.

All the girls did well – but I thought Chloe was phenomenal.  Maybe it was the costume but I was speaking Spanish the rest of the night!  Like I said on Twitter I am dying for one of those in my size!

Our thoughts exactly!

Awards kick off but not before an uncomfortable mother daughter dance/twerk off between Kristie Ray and Asia.

Solo (Chloe) – Spanish Ballet “Fired Up” – Second
Solo (Kendal) – Lyrical “Under My Spell” – Fifth
Solo (Nia!!!) – Tribute to Broadway Baby – Ninth
Group Number (whole team including Payton)  – “On the Verge” – Fourth

Untitled

Poor Nia got short-changed in the costume department this week! Chloe’s was on fire!

Has anyone else noticed how the ALDC is not placing nearly as high as they used to?  In earlier seasons it seemed like every competition was a sweep.

In the dressing room Abby is NOT happy with the results. (Maybe it’s because she has a crappy bra)  Suddenly Kristie Ray is spouting off about how sick of all of the moms she is and if Asia doesn’t get a solo they are going back to Los Angeles so Asia can do ”professional work”.  I wouldn’t be surprised if Kristie Ray did a different type of “professional work” once if you know what I mean.

Well junkies—what did you think!  Let me hear from you!!!  Comments get me through my 9-5 HA!

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5 comments

  1. avatar Britni Perry says:

    A picture of Payton was on the bottom row, in between Paige and Asia

  2. avatar Non Dance Mom says:

    Melissa pissed me off with the comment that Maddie would have loved to do the tribute to Broadway Baby. Didn’t she already do that? The girls as a group wanted to do a group dance in remembrance of BB and Abby said no then Maddie did her solo. It was earlier this season.

  3. avatar Cay says:

    If I remember correctly, they whole team wanted to do a tribute to Broadway Baby by doing a different dance than they were supposed to. That’s why Abby got mad and said no. They were learning another dance behind Abby’s back and not learning the one she wanted them to do. Maddie did the dance she was taught to do, she just DEDICATED it to Broadway Baby. That’s the difference. Yes Abby favorites Maddie, but not this time. No one wants to see that though because it’s Maddie.

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